Please stop.. I cannot hear myself think...

Someone asked me recently, why it is that I am mostly only able to blog when I am miserable.. or perhaps not when I am miserable, but when I am feeling negative emotions? They said that perhaps we only write about the emotions that are the strongest in us.. and that perhaps I should try and write (or find) the love..


Well.. they may have a point... because this morning I am struggling with negative emotions, and I have a few tough things to think about... and guess what? .. that's right... I suddenly feel like writing.. The problem though is one that I have mentioned before... There are some things I am unable to write about here.. because of sensitivity and privacy for some of my readers..


So I have been sitting staring at this post for the past twenty minutes trying to figure out what to write next...see.. all the words and thoughts flying around my head I cannot write here.. So it doesn't matter what I write about now, the writer-voice inside of me will not be silent until I get the thoughts out of my head and "onto paper" or screen.. as it were.. Which brings me full circle.. Perhaps I should just write the blog post I want to.. give freedom and voice to the thoughts in my head and suffer the consequences later.. But it doesn't seem fair to discuss other peoples issues on here for the world to see..


So I hold my tongue... bite down... try to silence the voice that begs release from the prison of my mind..

It is no use...the noise grows louder and my ability to shut it out grows weaker... it is making me crazy... I honestly feel a little crazy... I must get it out or I will continue to feed the poison...

But not here...
not for the world to see...
Just for the person it is intended for..
so I must leave the blog with this weak attempt at a post and swiftly turn to email ... I must do it now...

the noise is deafening..