Real or Not?

Cherry Mistmas!

Once again this year, I've had requests for my Tequila Christmas Cake recipe so here goes:

Please keep in your files as I am beginning to get tired of typing this up every year!

1 cup sugar
1 tsp baking powder
1 cup water
1 tsp. salt
1 cup brown sugar
Lemon juice
4 large eggs
Nuts
1 bottle tequila
2 cups dried fruit

Sample the tequila to check quality.

Take a large bowl; check the tequila again to be sure it is of the highest quality...Repeat.

Turn on the electric mixer. Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl.

Add 1 teaspoon of sugar. Beat again.

At this point, it is best to make sure the tequila is still OK.

Try another cup just in case.

Turn off the mixerer thingy.Break 2 eggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit.

Pick the fruit up off the floor.

Mix on the turner.If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers, just pry it loose with a drewscriver.

Sample the tequila to test for tonsisticity. Next, sift 2 cups of salt, orsomething.Check the tequila. Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts.

Add one table. Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink. Whatever you can find.Greash the oven.Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over.

Don't forget to beat off the turner. Finally, throw the bowl through the
window.

Finish the tequila and wipe the counter with the cat.

Cherry Mistmas!

Top Secret

I can't tell you yet...

But...

Its almost time to reveal THE SECRET!

Shhhhh... don't say a word...

But...

It is almost time..

Soon all will be revealed...

Daughtry Concert...

Ok.. so it seems that no matter where I go, I am always causing trouble..

On Friday night Lizelle and I went to see Daughtry at The Dome - Anyone who knows me knows I love Daughtry.. In fact, love is probably a mild word... I adore him... I know the words to all his songs.. There is a good chance that I have stalker qualities when it comes to Daughtry.. and George of course..

So on our way in, at the gate, they are searching people, as they do - and when we get to the front the "security" lady insists that the camera I am carrying is too big to take into the venue.  At this point I am feeling a wee bit frustrated - the car is miles away and to take the camera back would just be insanity...

While I am contemplating this, the "security" in the row next to us tells me that for "a little something", she will let me in with my camera!  Ahhh.. welcome to Africa.. everything is possible for a price!  We only have R100 notes on us.. so I stick R100 underneath my ticket and hand it to her - she takes it all smiles and duly lets us in with the camera.

The whole two hours Lizelle and I are snapping away with the camera - no problem!  During the second last song I go to take pictures of Daughtry.  While I am standing there with this camera stuck to my face trying to get a good view of him, suddenly my view becomes all blurry and I hear this really big voice (coming from somewhere above me) "Where is your media bracelet?" 

Hello God, is that you?

I take the camera away from my face just as I feel someone grabbing my wrist.  In front of me is this huge "rent a cop" who is behaving in a very aggressive manner.  It went like this..

Rent a cop - Lady I asked you where your media bracelet is
Me - I am not from the media
Rent a cop - then you are not allowed to take pictures with that camera.  How did you get through the door with that camera?
Me - I walked
Rent a cop - Dont get %&*&%  cheeky with me.  How did you get through the door with that camera?
Me - Dude, I am not being cheeky, I really did walk through the door.
Rent a cop - If you take one more %%^&*(* picture I will slap you with a R50 000 fine
Me - Listen, there is no need to flex your muscles with me!  I am not drunk and disorderly, I am not causing any trouble, all you had to do was ask me nicely and politely to put the camera away and I would have.  It is not necessary to speak to me in that tone.

With that, the Rent a cop walked away...

Eish..

The concertt was awesome though.. had a fabulous time!  He is so worth seeing live!

Proudly South African

Kulula is a low cost South African Airline - the great thing about this airline, is that they do not take themselves too seriously.  They are well known for all sorts of hilarious antics here in South Africa.  If only more companies (and people in general) would take themselves a little less seriously and remember that all work and no play makes you a very dull person!

Below are some pictures of one of their newest aircrafts and right at the bottom you will find some quotes from actual PA addressess to passengers.

Kulula airline attendants make an effort to make the in-flight "safety lecture" and announcements a bit more entertaining. Here are some real examples that have been heard or reported:

On a Kulula flight, (there is no assigned seating, you sit where you want) passengers were apparently having a hard time choosing, when a flight attendant announced, "People, people we're not picking out furniture here, find a seat and get in it!"
---o0o---
On another flight with a very "senior" flight attendant crew, the pilot said, "Ladies and gentlemen, we've reached cruising altitude and will be turning down the cabin lights. This is for your comfort and to enhance the appearance of your flight attendants."
----o0o---
On landing, the stewardess said, "Please be sure to take all of your belongings. If you're going to leave anything, please make sure it's something we'd like to have."
----o0o---
"There may be 50 ways to leave your lover, but there are only 4 ways out of this airplane."
---o0o---
"Thank you for flying Kulula. We hope you enjoyed giving us the business as much as we enjoyed taking you for a ride."
---o0o---
As the plane landed and was coming to a stop at Durban Airport , a lone voice came over the loudspeaker: "Whoa, big fella. WHOA!"
---o0o---
After a particularly rough landing during thunderstorms in the Karoo , a flight attendant on a flight announced, "Please take care when opening the overhead compartments because, after a landing like that, sure as hell everything has shifted."
---o0o---
From a Kulula employee: " Welcome aboard Kulula 271 to Port Elizabeth. To operate your seat belt, insert the metal tab into the buckle, and pull tight. It works just like every other seat belt; and, if you don't know how to operate one, you probably shouldn't be out in public unsupervised."
---o0o---
"In the event of a sudden loss of cabin pressure, masks will descend from the ceiling. Stop screaming, grab the mask, and pull it over your face. If you have a small child travelling with you, secure your mask before assisting with theirs. If you are travelling with more than one small child, pick your favourite."
---o0o---
Weather at our destination is 50 degrees with some broken clouds, but we'll try to have them fixed before we arrive. Thank you, and remember, nobody loves you, or your money, more than Kulula Airlines."
----o0o---
"Your seats cushions can be used for flotation; and in the event of an emergency water landing, please paddle to shore and take them with our compliments."
---o0o---
"As you exit the plane, make sure to gather all of your belongings. Anything left behind will be distributed evenly among the flight attendants. Please do not leave children or spouses.."
---o0o---
And from the pilot during his welcome message: "Kulula Airlines is pleased to announce that we have some of the best flight attendants in the industry. Unfortunately, none of them are on this flight!"
---o0o---
On Kulula flight 255 just after a very hard landing in Cape Town, the flight attendant came on the intercom and said, "That was quite a bump and I know what y'all are thinking. I'm here to tell you it wasn't the airline's fault, it wasn't the pilot's fault, it wasn't the flight attendant's fault. It was the asphalt."
---o0o---
On a Kulula flight into Cape Town on a particularly windy and bumpy day, during the final approach the Captain really had to fight it. After an extremely hard landing, the Flight Attendant said, "Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to The Mother City. Please remain in your seats with your seat belts fastened while the Captain taxis what's left of our airplane to the gate!"
---o0o---
Another flight attendant's comment on a less than perfect landing: "We ask you to please remain seated as Captain Kangaroo bounces us to the terminal."
---o0o---
An airline pilot wrote that on this particular flight he had hammered his ship into the runway really hard. The airline had a policy which required the first officer to stand at the door while the passengers exited, smile, and give them a "Thanks for flying our airline." He said that, in light of his bad landing, he had a hard time looking the passengers in the eye, thinking that someone would have a smart comment. Finally everyone had gotten off except for a little old lady walking with a cane. She said, "Sir, do you mind if I ask you a question?"
"Why, no Ma'am," said the pilot. "What is it?" The little old lady said, "Did we land, or were we shot down?"
---o0o---
After a real crusher of a landing in Johannesburg , the attendant came on with, "Ladies and Gentlemen, please remain in your seats until Captain Crash and the Crew have brought the aircraft to a screeching halt
against the gate. And, once the tyre smoke has cleared and the warning bells are silenced, we will open the door and you can pick your way through the wreckage to the terminal.."
---o0o---
Part of a flight attendant's arrival announcement: "We'd like to thank you folks for flying with us today. And, the next time you get the insane urge to go blasting through the skies in a pressurized metal tube, we hope you'll think of Kulula Airways."
---o0o---
Heard on a Kulula flight: "Ladies and gentlemen, if you wish to smoke, the smoking section on this airplane is on the wing. If you can light 'em, you can smoke 'em."

Johannesburg Pride 2010

 Can you believe that this guy actually walked around like this the whole day???  I figured due to the sensitive nature of some of my readers, I would show you the view from behind and spare you the full frontal!

 And these guys were in full Playboy Bunny gear.. unfortunately they took off the shirts before I could get a picture!

 This was hilarious!  This girls shirt says, : Pasop vir die darkies.  Which, translated into English means, "Beware of the darkies" I am not going to go into this in detail.. if you do not see the humour in this T-Shirt, then you have never lived in SA!  We had such a good laugh with this girl.. she must have the most wicked sense of humour of anyone I met there!

 I felt rather manly next to these two "ladies"

 She asked me if we could hurry up and take the pic as she had so many eligible people still to meet..lol

 Ahhhh... the boys... damn it was so hot standing here..

Lizelle's idea of heaven... tsk tsk, we all have our dreams!

Last Saturday I went to Johannesburg's annual Gay Pride March - this year marks the 21st anniversary of this event.  I was invited to Pride (those in the know simply call it Pride (apparently)) by Lizelle who is very quickly becoming a close friend of mine. 

I cannot say that I was not a little nervous.. I was sure that I was going to be the only straight person amongst 50 000 gay people.  Lizelle assured me that I would be perfectly safe as apparently I do not feature on the Gaydar (If I need to explain Gaydar you should not be reading this post) at all - now, I know I am a little weird, but I kind of took offence to this... oi.. chicks.. never happy!

Anyway.. I have to say that it was one of the best days I have had in a long time.  Everyone was so friendly and welcoming.. there was no aggression.. no fighting.. and no bursting testosterone that usually goes along with drinking beer in the sun - although, having said that, there was plenty fluffing of tail feathers.. prancing.. and of course the inevitable wrist waving..

For the benefit of my heterosexual readers, here are some interesting things I learnt about the gay world that you may not be aware of:

1.  Only straight people use the word lesbian.

2. Unless you are talking about the angry lesbians - if you are speaking of them, it seems to be acceptable to use the word lesbian...

3.  Due to my unwillingness to upset the angry lesbians, I will not go into detail on how to spot one.

4.  Just because your legs look better in heels than mine do, doesn't mean you should be wearing stripper heels - it takes years of practice to pull this off.

5.  If you insist on wearing heels and very little else, you should at least shave or preferably wax.

6.  If you do not understand why you should not be saying the word lesbian, it is too late to google it.

7.  The gay world is far less hung-up on shallow things than the heterosexual world.

8.  They are also far more accommodating of your prejudice than you are of their lifestyle.

9.  They don't care what you think.

10. Nor should they have to.

11. Feathers are not a special occasion accessory, but rather a life changing necessity of the modern world.

12. Good support is vital no matter which body part you need to wear it on (see picture 1).

13.  If someone who weighs more than you pinches your bum, you should thank them from the bottom of your heart for giving you any attention at all.

14. If we all could live and let live, this world would be a happier place.

15. The most important lesson I learnt last weekend, was that prejudice is born from fear of the unknown.

I had an absolutely rocking time with Lizelle, Kim and ALL the girls on Saturday... and you can be sure that next year I will be there with bells on.. literally.. I think it is time bells make a comeback!

Play dates, 100's & 1000's and chaos!

Caleb had a friend over from school for a play date yesterday! Holy moly it was chaos...  All children love to bake...  So.. in a moment of madness, I thought it would be a good idea to let them make cookies.. and the truth, is that they had so much fun.. and so did I.. but I doubt my kitchen will ever be the same!

 

Guest Blogging...

Okay.. so I know I have to write a blog about what happened last weekend... I know I need to.. both for my sanity and yours, but I am just not ready to do it yet...   I need to put some space and time between the event and my head.  I want to be able to write it from an objective point of view and not from an emotional one.  You all saw the emotional posts from the weekend.. and I don't want to go there again.. so I am going to give it some time.. The writer inside me will know when it is time to get it out...

So.... moving on from that...

I would like to do some guest blogging.. We could swap blogs for one post.. Or, if you do not have a blog, you could just guest blog on mine.. I figure this would give us exposure to new audiences as well as fresh ideas..  Obviously the owner of the blog will have final say on what is posted on their blog.

If any of you would like to participate in this, please drop me a mail, or comment on this post and lets get the creativity flowing and sharing...:)

Do you understand Quantum Mechanics?

They're coming to take me away ha ha hee hee to the funny farm where life is beautiful all the time...

I scored 19.886363636363636% on this test... How did you do?

The Truth of it...

I love this... I read it today for the first time and it made me smile !

Wordless Wednesday

What is wrong with this picture?

Stupid is as Stupid does....

Budget speech for Dummies

I received this in an email - I have managed to ignore the sentence construction and other grammatical errors and left it verbatim..Almost fell off my chair laughing when I read it..

"If you did not understand the minister’s budget speech here it goes…………………

Economic recovery

It is a slow day in the small Eastern Cape Province town of King William’s Town , and streets are deserted. Times are tough, everybody is in debt, and everybody is living on credit.

A rich tourist visiting the area drives through town, stops at the hotel, and lays a R200 note on the desk saying he wants to inspect the rooms upstairs to pick one for the night.

As soon as he walks upstairs, the hotel owner grabs the note and runs next door to pay his debt to the butcher.

The butcher takes the R200 and runs down the street to retire his debt to the pig farmer.

The pig farmer takes the R200 and heads off to pay his bill to his supplier, the Farmer's Co-op.

The guy at the Farmer's Co-op takes the R200 and runs to pay his debt to the local prostitute, who has also been facing hard times and has had to offer her "services" on credit.

The hooker rushes to the hotel and pays off her room bill with the hotel owner.

The hotel proprietor then places the R200 back on the counter so the rich traveller will not suspect anything.

At that moment the traveller comes down the stairs, states that the rooms are not satisfactory, picks up the R200 note and leaves town.

No one produced anything. No one earned anything... However, the whole town is now out of debt and now looks to the future with a lot more optimism.

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is how the South African government is conducting business today."

Blog Hop from Africa

Recipe Swap!

Traditional South African Bobotie!

Ingredients:
2 Onions
cooking oil or butter
1kg Minced meat (mutton or beef)
1 Slice bread
250ml (1c) milk
2 eggs
15ml (1T) medium curry powder
22.5ml (1.5T) sugar
10ml (2t) salt
2.5ml(0.5t) pepper
7.5ml (0.5T) turmeric
30ml (2T) vinegar or juice of 1 lemon
6 almonds quartered
125ml (0.5c) seedless raisins
4 bay leaes or grated yellow rind of 1 lemon
45ml chutney

Preperation:
1. Preheat the oven to 180 C (350F).
2. Peel and slice the onions thinly. Fry lightly in hot cooking oil and if uncooked meat is used, fry with the onions until slightly cooked and crumbly.
3. Soak the bread in the mild and squeeze out the milk. Mash the bread.
4. Mix all the ingredients except 125ml milk, 1 egg and the bay leaves.
5. Spoon the mixture into a greased oven dish, insert the bay leaves in an upright positon in the meat mixture.
6. Bake for 1 hour if uncooked meat is used and for 45 minutes if cooked meat is used.
7. Beat the remaining egg with 125ml milk and pour over the meat 30 minutes before the end of the cooking time.
8. Serve with rice and chutney and perhaps a green salad!

Enjoy!

Stuff my 4-year-old says..

Caleb: " I feel crazy as a woman today!"

See.. the sun does shine on Mud Island? This is Worthing...

This is Chris and Anne's house in St Johns where we stayed for a few days - lovely house and such a pretty garden - and look.. no security...

This was taken in Windsor - enjoying traditional bitter ale after a long day walking round Windsor Castle

I am leaving on a jet plane

Hi readers,

I will be in London for the next 10 days, Sam, my friend will be guest blogging for me while I am away!

See you all when I get back - enjoy Sam!

Benoni Gathering of the Clans

These videos were taken at the Gathering at Benoni High last weekend - It was also the SA Champs - well done to the Jocks.. you deserved to win, you were, without doubt, the best on the day!

The first video is of BMT - we have been rooting for them for years (Go Gareth & Bruce) which is why I took a video of them, but I have to say that this year they were really not up to scratch as you will see when you watch it. Had I known how absolutely awesome the Jocks would be, I would have taken a vid of them instead.

BTW.. in case you are wondering.. yes I love the pipes! The third video is my favourite - I missed the beginning because some silly man was chatting to me..

Enjoy!

MckLinky Blog Hop!

My blog is about anything and everything!

I love posting pictures of my family and friends and blogging about the goings-ons in my life. More importantly though are the posts that I blog about my "thoughts" these posts are concerned with whatever is on my mind at the time - be it religion, politics, emotional topics or just my random thoughts on life and my purpose in it!

My blog has become an obsession with me and there are very few days that I do not post about something. I love to write and the more I write the more I want to write!

Hi, my name is Kerren and I am an addicted blogger!

I hope you will enjoy reading my blog as much as I enjoy writing it!

It only counts if they see you...